When I first began my determined efforts at Waking Up, & liberating my inherent Awakened Self, I would get so discouraged, & I sometimes still do. The goal is so far away, being Buddha ……….. it will take lifetimes of effort, or what seems like the efforts of many lives. But I know one thing for sure: somehow it means Love.
Long and Winding Road (Photo credit: itmpa)
Now, there are Teachings galore, giving guidance toward training one’s mind, toward changing one’s ways of being so that the clouded Buddha self can begin to shine. The Dharma is rich & varied, & presented in many ways, so that all personalities, & all levels of growth can find it useful. But the Teachings don’t tell each of us how to live love in our personal lives; we have to figure the particulars out ourselves. And with the goal so distant, I asked: Wah! What am I supposed to do in the meantime?!? If I’m not yet that Buddha-to-be, or — more accurately: manifesting the Buddha-that-I-am — what do I do with myself until then??
inquisitive pidgeon (Photo credit: JunCTionS)
I seriously want to know, for I don’t want to waste any more time. (Well, let’s be honest here: I don’t want to waste all of my time, but I’m likely to waste some of it, lol). Here I am though in what is probably just the middle of a very long life, & the old ways of being don’t satisfy anymore. I mean, those ways & days of just pleasing myself, just doing what an external authority imposes upon me, just going through life haphazardly …….. they are not enough. I want to make a difference, yet I am so small, certainly no hero, nor savior. I think the grand gestures that some can accomplish are beyond what I can do; at least it feels that way now. But it does feel right to live love, somehow.
Portrait of Buddha, in teaching posture (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Wondering what Living Love means, I asked these questions in my dreams, in my prayers, in my meditations, asking & fretting because my long-time habit is to be easily discouraged, & to give up. I queried: How do I DO this? How can my frail efforts add up enough to be progress toward my Buddha Goal? How would I be worthy of it until I can reach it?? And one day, suddenly I knew! I knew the answer to my question: “What do I do until I’m Enlightened??” Make the world more bearable for someone else.
And this is what I believe Living Love IS. It is bringing some relief to another’s suffering, lightening their load, helping them be a little happier. Small efforts? Maybe. Worthy efforts? Oh, for sure, because here’s what I realize as I write this (ding! ding! ding!): No matter what the effort is, or how small, if it is loving, if it is an act of love, then it is Living Love, & there’s no waste in that.
- She-who-would-choose-to-wake-up (mindmindful.wordpress.com)
- Samsara and nirvana (jampasmandala.wordpress.com)